Date Night Jar Ideas: 60 Slips to Fill It (and a Smarter Way to Use It)

July 3, 2026 · 7 min read

A date night jar is the simplest relationship tool there is: a jar, a stack of paper slips, and a rule that when you pull one, you do it. No debating, no "I don't know, what do you want to do?" The jar decides. Here is how to make one you will actually keep using, 60 slip ideas you can copy straight in, and the twist that fixes the jar's one big flaw.

How to make a date night jar (the five-minute version)

1. Find any jar. Mason jar, empty candle jar, a mug. The container is the least important part.
2. Cut 30 to 60 slips of paper. Colored paper is cute for sorting by category, but scrap paper works.
3. Write one date per slip. Steal freely from the lists below. Each of you writes half, and here is the important part: do not show each other what you wrote.
4. Set the rule. One pull per week, or per month, whatever fits your life. The pull is binding. That is the whole game.
5. Put the jar where you can see it. A jar in a cabinet is a jar you forget by March.

Cheap and free slips (the backbone of the jar)

• Sunset walk with takeout coffee, phones stay home
• Cook one dish neither of us has ever made
• Board game tournament, loser does dishes for a week
• Drive somewhere we have never been within 30 minutes
• Picnic on the living room floor
• Go through old photos and pick our ten favorites
• Library date: each picks a book for the other
• Make a playlist together, one song each, alternating
• Watch the movie that came out the year we met
• Stargazing with blankets and hot chocolate
• Try every free sample at the fancy grocery store
• Teach each other something we are good at
• Bake something from a recipe handed down in either family
• Walk the prettiest street in town at golden hour
• Write each other a letter to open in one year

Need more in this lane? We keep a whole list of cheap and free date night ideas.

Dinner-out slips (the ones the jar was made for)

• Dinner at a restaurant neither of us has been to
• Order the second-cheapest and second-most-expensive thing on the menu
• Dinner in the neighborhood we always drive through but never stop in
• A cuisine we have never tried, no vetoes
• Sit at the bar and let the bartender or chef choose
• Revisit our first-date restaurant and order completely differently
• Dessert-only crawl: three places, three desserts
• The restaurant with the best view within an hour
• Tasting menu night, dress up like it is an occasion
• Find the oldest restaurant in town and hear its story

At-home slips (for the weeks you cannot get out)

• Homemade pizza night with a build-your-own bar
• Candlelit dinner at the actual dining table, real plates
• Wine or hot-chocolate tasting with blind rankings
• Spa night: robes, face masks, cucumber water, the works
• Build a fort and watch a movie inside it
• Recreate the dish from our favorite restaurant
• Puzzle and a podcast neither of us has heard
• Cook-off: same ingredients, two cooks, one honest judge (us)

There are plenty more where those came from in our at-home date night ideas.

Adventure slips (sprinkle a few of these in)

• Day trip decided by a coin flip at every major intersection
• Book the class we keep saying we will take: pottery, salsa, cooking
• Hike a trail neither of us has done, pack a summit snack
• Tourist-in-our-own-city day: do the three things visitors do
• Karaoke, and both of us have to actually sing
• Farmers market with $20 each: build dinner from what we find
• Take the train or bus to the end of the line and explore
• Say yes to the next local event flyer we see

The jar's one big flaw (and the twist that fixes it)

Here is what actually happens to most date night jars. The first month is magic. Then one night you pull "go ice skating" in July, laugh, put it back, and pull again. Once you start re-pulling, the jar stops being in charge, and a jar that is not in charge is just decor. The rule was doing all the work, and the rule quietly died.

The twist that fixes it: stop pulling slips and start taking turns as the planner. One of you picks the date this time, in secret, using the jar (or anything else) as inspiration. The other just shows up. Next time, switch. Suddenly nobody can veto, the surprise is back, and the effort is shared perfectly evenly. It keeps everything good about the jar and removes the re-pull loophole.

That taking-turns ritual is exactly what Candlewick turns into an app: you and your partner alternate secretly picking a spot neither of you has been, the pick stays sealed until reservation day, you reveal it together, and every date gets saved to a private year-long timeline for just the two of you. It is the date night jar, upgraded with secrecy, fairness, and a memory book. If the jar is where your date nights start, Candlewick is where they end up.

Want more to fill your slips with? Start with our 23 fun date night ideas, or if you are the one planning this round, our guide on how to surprise your partner with a date.

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